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Are you thinking about being married in St Peter’s? We are delighted, and hope that we can do everything to help make your wedding day special. We have set out some thoughts and considerations below that will help you start to plan your special day.
Once you have looked through, them please get in contact with the verger Graham Paisley or one of the clergy. You will be asked to come to see them to talk through details in the Vestry at church on a Wednesday evening between 6.45 pm & 7.30 pm. Why get married in Church?
A marriage service, wherever it is held, is a public declaration of love and commitment to your partner. If you choose to get married in church, there is an added dimension – the assurance that God cares about your relationship and that his resources and strength are available to help you. Including God in your marriage doesn’t mean that you will avoid all the usual ups and downs, but you will know that you can look to God for help and guidance and that his love will sustain you. You will also have the support and encouragement of the Christian Church family. What do Christians believe about marriage?
The Bible compares married love to the love Jesus has for his followers. He expressed his love by being prepared to sacrifice himself, even to die for the people he loved. This is amazing, unconditional love. Jesus never said, ‘I love you but…’ In our marriages we can try to follow his model by loving our partners in a self-sacrificial way, putting their needs before our own.
The marriage ceremony gives you a new legal status as husband and wife and a new stability within which your relationship can flourish and grow. Christians believe that marriage offers the right place for the fulfilment of our sexuality and that it provides a stable and secure environment for bringing up children. A Guide to Marriage at St Peter's Church
Marriage is one of the biggest decisions anybody will make in life. It can be the beginning of a wonderful life with the person you love. But the wedding day itself can seem daunting, and making a go of married life an even greater challenge. We want to do all we can to make your wedding day special, and to help you prepare for a lifetime together. We hope the following information will help make a start… FAQ’s Who can get married? Marriage in the Church of England must between a man and a woman over the age of 18 years (or over the age of 16 if you have the written consent of your parents). You must not be married to anybody else, and may not be more closely related than first cousins. If one or both of you are not British Citizens, you will need to discuss the possibility of obtaining a Special Licence with the minister at the outset, before a date for your wedding can be confirmed. God loves everyone, and Christian marriage is open to all those who ask for a Christian wedding: you do not need to be baptised or confirmed in the Church of England. What if one of us is divorced? Marriage in the Church of England is sometimes available to people who are divorced and whose previous partner is still alive. Your parish priest will need to talk with you in some detail to see whether this can be possible. Which church can I get married in? At the moment, provided you meet the conditions above, you have a right to be married at St. Peter’s as long as one or both of you live in our parish. If you’re not sure whether you do, you can ask us, or check the map for yourself on our website: www.stpeters-woolton.org.uk . You may also be married in St. Peter’s if you have been worshipping with us regularly on Sundays for six months or more and are on the Electoral Roll. You will need to have your banns called in St. Peter’s, and also in any other churches whose parish you or your fiancé (e) live in. Marriage at a church with a qualifying connection Following the change in recent wedding regulations by the Church of England Marriage Measures Act 2008 it is now possible for a couple to be married in a church that has a special meaning to them. Therefore from 1st October 2008, providing the church is available for a service; couples will be able to choose to get married in: - their local parish
- the parish where they were baptised and/or confirmed
- a parish they have lived in for 6 months or more, at any time during their lives
- a parish they have attended worship in for at least 6 months
- the parish their parents lived or worshipped in (during the child's lifetime)
- either of you have a parent or granparent whowas married in the parish
How do I apply? Come and see us at Vestry Hour at St. Peter’s – Wednesday between 6.45pm-7.30pm. Alternatively you can contact one of us for an initial chat: Revd Kip Crooks 0151 4281853 rector@stpeters-woolton.org.uk Revd Penny Andrews 0151 4289458 Mr Graham Paisley 0151 4286810 verger@stpeters-woolton.org.uk You will need to fill in an application form, so that we have a record of the full details which will need to be entered on the marriage certificate. Please inform us as early as possible about your plans. Planning the service Once you have met with church staff and the date for your wedding is booked, you will need to think through a number of details in planning the service. Some things to be considered include: - Do you wish to use a traditional or a modern service? - Will the bride (or the groom) be ‘given away’ by parents or family members? - Which music would you like? This may include hymns, songs, organ and recorded music. - Which readings and prayers? If you have only one reading it must be from the Bible. - Will both or you receive a ring, or only the bride? - Do you want to produce your own printed order of service? (we can provide a basic photocopied version in the package) We want the day to be special, and will try to allow you to choose your own way of doing things, provided it is in keeping with a Christian ceremony and with legal requirements. However, if you are not sure we will guide and help with the planning at every stage. Take a look at our Service Resources pages for some ideas for readings/hymns etc (p5 & 6) Preparing for married life Your wedding day is only a beginning. The whole of your married life lies ahead, and we want to help prepare you for that. The minister preparing for the wedding will want to help you think through what marriage involves, usually as you meet to carry on with preparing the wedding ceremony together, but we would also strongly encourage you to attend our Marriage Preparation Course. We will let you know dates and times of these if and when your booking is confirmed. How much will it cost? For fees in 2010 please have a word with a member of the clergy or our Verger Graham.fees will be available on our website shortly As of 2010 fees are as follows Standard Wedding (including Organist) £460 Optional Extras Bells - Weekend £160 Bells Weekday £300 Video/Audio Recording £ 50 Floral Pew End Decorations £ 35 Order of Service (up to 100 copie) £50 Refreshments after the service By arrangement You can pay by cheque (payable to St. Peter’s PCC) or cash and will be given a receipt. We would appreciate payment either before or, at the latest, on the day of the wedding rehearsal. Photographs and Video Please note that no flash photography is allowed during the ceremony. I you plan to have a video made, please allow only one video camera, and note that some music and songs lyrics are covered by copyright. Also if you are hiring a photographer and/or a videographer, please ensure that they contact us prior to the wedding day to discuss acceptable filming positions in the church. Flowers If you wish to purchase your own fresh flower display for the church, in addition to what we would normally have, our Flower Arranger, Jacqui Cliffe will be happy to discuss this with you. She can be contacted on 0151 488 0416. Alternatively, if you engage a local florist please ensure that they contact us prior to the wedding to discuss what would be suitable. The Rehearsal It is essential that you come to the church for a rehearsal in the week before the wedding itself. This date will be arranged in due course. Those who should be there are: The bride and groom The best man The chief bridesmaid Family member who is ‘giving away’ the bride Finding out more Please feel free to contact us at any stage if you have questions about any element of your wedding. More details about weddings in the Church of England can be found at: www.cofe.anglican.org/lifeevents/weddings A final and important word of encouragement A Christian wedding is not just about being in a church or having a particular ceremony. Most importantly, you are not heading off into married life alone: God wants to be with you! We will be praying for you as the wedding day approaches, during the ceremony itself, and for your life together in the years ahead.
Service Resources Music Hymns There are usually two or three hymns during a wedding service. Try to find hymns that are familiar to those who will be present - and are easy to sing! The following are popular choices: - All things bright and beautiful
- Come down O love divine
- Father hear the prayer we offer
- Give me joy in my heart
- Love divine, all loves excelling
- Lead us, heavenly Father, lead us
- Lord of all hopefulness
- Make me a channel of your peace
- Morning has broken
- One more step along the world I go
- O, praise ye the Lord
- Now thank we all our God
- Praise my soul, the king of heaven
- The king of love my shepherd is
The minister preparing your service or our organist will be pleased to help you make your choice, and we can loan you a song book if you cannot remember or find the lyrics. Processional Music Many couples choose the traditional "Bridal March" from Lohengrin by Wagner, for the entrance of the Bride, and "Wedding March" by Mendelssohn for when the Bride & Groom leave. However, there is other music that can be chosen, so if you want something different, please talk to us about your thoughts. As we have a very good sound system at St. Peter’s, we can also provide the facility to play recorded music. Readings There are many popular and exciting readings. Read some of these together in a modern Bible and see if what they say seems important to you: - God creates women and men to look after the earth (Genesis, Chapter 1, v 26-28)
- A love poem between two lovers (Song of Solomon, Ch 2, v 10-13; Ch 8, v 6&7)
- Jesus teaches how to live life that brings true happiness (Matthew, Ch 5, v 1-10)
- Jesus teaches about marriage, and welcomes children (Mark, Ch 10, v 6-9 & 13-16)
- What happens when Jesus attends a wedding reception (John, Ch 2, v 1 - 11)
- Love, actually! (1 Corinthians Ch 13) – v 1 to 7 can be used as a shorter version if preferred)
- Committing to each other (Ephesians Ch 5, v 21-33)
- Seeing the good side… (Philippians Ch 4, v 4 - 9)
- Getting the perfect relationship (Colossians Ch 3, v 12 - 17)
- Being a good lover! (1 John Ch 4 v 7 - 12)
If you haven’t got a Bible at home, we will be happy to let you borrow one, or alternatively readings are available to view online at www.biblegateway.com Your minister will be pleased to help you choose the right readings for your wedding service. As well as other Bible readings, he or she may be happy for you to include a suitable non-religious reading. Online Resources There are a number of wedding websites with suggestions for music and readings that you could also refer to: www.2-in-2-1.co.uk If you go to the 'Wedding Centre' section of their site you will find lots of suggestions about hymns. www.confetti.co.uk This site includes the words and music of the more popular wedding hymns as well as suggestions for readings. www.weddingguide.co.uk The Information and Advice section has suggestions for readings and music including clips of the more popular processional music to help you make your choice. www.weddings.co.uk/info This gives some Biblical and other readings for your wedding. January 2010 |
